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Thanks for visiting.

Whether you just read, or you post comments too, or you've thrown caution to the wind and become a follower, I thank you.

Get It Write

I am a fan of letters. Real, live handwritten missives. Whether you share my letter-love or not, please take the time to write a card to the family when someone dies.

It doesn't have to be long. Sharing a simple memory will mean the world to the family. They will likely be enjoyed by subsequent generations, providing a glimpse into the life of their ancestor.

E-mails are for the moment. Letters are forever.

Today I was able to copy a letter written by a Civil War soldier about his fallen friend, Captain Sam Stewart. In it, the soldier describes Capt. Stewart's brave leadership, the way he died, and how his troops paid their respects as they laid him to rest.

The fact the letter still exists speaks to how much the family treasured this first-hand account.

You may not have such dramatic details to share in your letter, but it will surely be appreciated just the same.

Don't underestimate the power of doing this. What better gift could you give? Write a few words about your times together, how the deceased loved their family, a song or place that makes you think of them, anything that comes to mind.

It's never too late, either. Consider sending your thoughts in a Christmas card. If you feel comfortable, send a letter on their birthday.

It doesn't matter how much you write or when you send it. The important thing is to do it.

Great Tribute Idea!

Now, THIS is a wonderful tribute.

Emily Hoffman is writing a book in memory of her mother, who died of cancer. Emily cooked with her mom every week, and discusses their story on her blog, A Blending of Bittersweet Memories. (On my blogroll to the left.)

Through her mother's recipes, she remembers their time together. She's open to your submissions, too.

I just love this idea. Who doesn't associate family recipes with the people we love?

Well done, Emily. Good luck!

I Have a Book Deal!

Today I signed a contract with Turner Publishing's Trade Paper Press. My book will be part of their Good Things To Know series.

I couldn't be happier! I want to thank Todd Bottorff and everyone at Turner.

I'll be (very) busy meeting my deadline, so see you in June.

If you have anything to contribute, please send your remarks to me ASAP.

A HUGE thank you to everyone who has come here, posted, called, or emailed me offline. I appreciate it more than I can say. Your willingness to share these private and painful experiences with me is humbling. I will do my best to get it right so others can learn from it. Hopefully we can help make the path a little easier for them.

The Stories Clergy Could Tell...

If you want to write a book about grief, you interview those who have been through it. Then, I figure you have 3 main sources of inside info. Hospice, grief support groups, and the clergy.

Hospice? Check.

Support groups? Check.

Clergy? Not so much.

You might think it's that client privilege thing, or whatever it's called between you and your pastor. I thought so too, but that's not I'm getting from them. No, it's more of an array of not enough time, nothing comes to mind, or let me think about it.

It's been very frustrating. Here's the inside guy (or gal). Right there, in the inner circle. They've seen it all, so why keep it to themselves?

Well, guess what? My preacher-luck seems to have changed. Tomorrow I'm meeting with a pastor. Yep, in person and everything.

Wish him candor, and wish me luck!

Just One Thing-What Helped?

What helped you after a loss?

What did someone say that comforted you? What did someone do for you that you remember for all the right reasons?

If there was something you wish someone had done, or something you do now for others, I want to hear about that too!

Thanks.

I'll wait right here.........